Monday, August 18, 2008

Hey world,

Today we had our check-out cleaning checks. My best friend/roommate got home from Australia Saturday night, we spent all day with his family and then we had to come home and clean forever! I felt so bad. He is such a good guy, he wanted to clean and yet he was so tired. He cleaned anyway and still made it to work on time this morning. He didn't care about 'jet-lag' or excuses. He had a job and a responsibility and he was going to honor it and not let anything get in his way. He really taught me a lot this morning on what kind of person is going to be successful and happy.

Right now however he is moving out and talking to his friend about staying at his place for the next week. I'm really sad about this. I know it's nothing personal but he is a tremendous friend, one that you don't find too often. I know we'll still hang out, but it still is hard. Ho hum. hmm.

Friday, August 15, 2008

A Hasty Heart

Tonight I went to see a play called 'The Hasty Heart.' I was given two tickets and found out last night that one of my good friends loved theater and so I called her up to ask her to go with me. She agreed and we went out. However I felt so awkward. I wanted it to be a date, but I didn't. I don't think it was a date, but maybe it was. It was just two friends going to see a play and I think she only had that in mind. But do I have unexpressed feelings for her? I thought I did, but it's hard to know. I'm not really good with the whole dating thing.

The play was called 'The Hasty Heart' and the theme was 'Sorrow is born from a hasty heart.' -meaning, when we are hasty with our love we may give rise to sorrow. The antagonist was a cold, prideful soldier who was about to die from liver failure, only he didn't know this until the end of the play. Meanwhile everyone else in the medical ward knew of his imminent demise and tried to befriend him and making him feel as comfortable and loved as possible. It took him most of the play to warm up and accept their friendship but when he discovered the truth he felt betrayed and more alone forever, hence he felt like he was hasty in giving his heart and now bore unbearable sorrow. I feel like I've often been in this position where trust is shared and then abused. But it reminded me how great it is for that while you do love and are loved. To feel a sense of belonging and love; to be with others. I don't quite remember where I was going with all of this, but it was a meaningful and moving play. It really made me think and that is one of my favorite aspects of live theater. It can present issues and make you feel and think things you may never have experienced or understood so clearly.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Search is On

I'm currently hunting, with the pirate oath as my guide I am traveling everywhere, burning everything and stealing anything that is not nailed down. You'd be surprised how hard it is to find employment in a land-locked place like desert Utah with a mantra like that.
A few weeks ago I decided I had worked at Risk Management and Safety as a "fire guy" long enough. So at least I have the burn everything down, or did. But I didn't have a new job when I left. Situations were such that I needed to leave one way or another as quickly as possible. So I finished up my projects and never looked back.

Now I'm sitting here, Tuesday, I've only been jobless since last Monday, and while the vacation was nice, I'm now starting to get cabin fever. But it's not for not trying. I've sent out close to 20 resumes and applications. I've had two responses and didn't get the first job but I have high hopes for the second. Sadly, I can't start there until Aug. 25 when they begin the next training group.

There are a lot of jobs out there and I'm sure I could do many of them. I just hate this waiting dance; submit, call, dress, interview, call, and not only does it finish with starting over, I often face several different dance steps at the same time.

So for now, I'm still looking. Wish me luck. And if you know of any AMAZING jobs, I'm looking, and Very Very capable!